Madness

Madness is when test is coming in no second and you are just feeling like not prepared

Madness is when you think you're going for the second puberty (which is so eeew by the way)

Madness is when you feel like your hormones got the best of you in making you look as the worst kind

Madness is when you realize you want to have the high school romance all over again with the different guy

Madness is when you try to handle 2 jobs adequately, organizations, and med-school at the very same time

Madness is when you try to find a concept for a novel, but it just wasn't there

Madness is when you realize that your life has been too long for such a short journey

Madness is when you start to realize that on this very wide world there are only few, in fact one person that can fit the description as your BEST FRIEND

MADNESS is when all these things happen i try so hard to think about them at the same time that i feel like my brain is about to explode at anytime.

But you know what else is mad?

that a single song or a single activity that you really fond of can wipe all of them from your very mind.

Mine? I just did it. I just wrote. 

And as if God knows that I wouldn't get any better He plays me "Stereo Hearts" on tv and got me to finally smile and realize that all of those madness is great. It's a proof that I'm alive and I am not numb. Even if i am mad, I am living my own life :)

Skyscraper

Climbing my way up and up. You may underestimate me, I don't mind. But when I get to the top you'll be sitting in despair regretting every word. The sky might be high, but I'm running to catch it, I'm a skyscraper

meng-autis

how great is the universe

Have you for once look at the sky and notice how starry or dark it is? How pretty or how the star is blinking though they are million kilometers of light speed away from us? Or how the clouds' color is dark at night?

or

Have you ever notice how the leaves of a tree are falling? Humbly it falls to the ground and never complained having us stepping on them.

You might have more important things to do. Like going to work or maybe changing the world

But if just you would stop for one minute, no at least 3 seconds and notice the inner peace that the nature prepares you, you might just breathe. You might even smile

This is how I want to start myself everyday, by thanking God for all the things He has created and balanced. This is how I want to start changing the world by thanking God for the universe.

Look at yourselves how many times you feel unhappy for your old creaky car, while some other have to walk for miles scratching the soil looking for pennies.
Look at how people are just so ignorant to the nature makes a lot of profit out of them and still the nature is there for human.

If God would want it by a single sun storm and we'd lose everything. But God still gives us chances. For what? To repair the inner you to have the same frequency with the nature. How start noticing, thanking, then caring.

The universe is already good and great enough, why cant we be exactly like that? Is human really that animal?

A Year Later.

This is Elza. Not much differences in looks only... But I'm 18.

I've lived isolated from my ultimate hobby in the world for more than a year.   WRITING.

Some people really felt like it was a thousands steps back from me to quit writing at first, but I literally have no time just to think outside the box. Medical School is all about textbook and handbook practices. I went from Mia Thermopolis fairytale to Heart Physiology of Exercise #suddensilence. My life and how I see the world now, are so much different to everything in High School. Good different I assume and I want to share it with people.  I mean my head is so much lighter, my time is soo much more efficient with the same amount of fun, I can follow my education very well, and I'm still pursuing my dreams, to become a writer. Going to Med-School and going to graduate as a doctor doesn't mean I should stop pursuing my dreams or looking at the shattered glass for a long time in regrets. I should've been more mature and picked up all those pieces and create a new mosaic from the shattered dreams. Well, no time for regrets, I am making my own Dream Mosaics right now.

How do I wake up from the young people uncertainty? I will go over them one by one later in my writings in this blog later. But if you're not really sure I've changed, you are so welcome to read all the posts I have under this one. All of them might be different from each other but actually the have a strong similarity. They are too random, unfocused, and fully-loaded by uncertainty. That was me a year ago. A fussy wordmouth plentyful (i have no idea what it means. Just like combining word like that. Lol) - i complained a lot - and I was having a hard time enjoying my own life by considering little things that won't matter in my future as SOS-need-to-be-handled-right-now stuff.

This is not just another blog...It's my experience of growing up. It doesn't mean I have done growing up, I'm still in the process and I'm learning too together with all of you...with all the randomness in the world.

#brainsynaptic : IF YOU FEEL LIKE THE WORLD IS ENDING RIGHT NOW, THINK ABOUT A FEW YEARS TO COME AND HOW YOU'LL LAUGH SHYLY AND PROUD AT TODAY THAT YOU HAVE MADE IT THROUGH. And else, remember you have survived the toughest journey before you were even born, caved in for 9 months inside a tiny watery womb with all the risks that comes along that were ready to prevent you from being born, but you made it right? world is not even a quarter of that...HAVE SOME FAITH BIG BABY!

presents

to begin with this very hectic experiences of mine *drama queen*

i'm going to start with the word NEW

it's new people
new environment

new habits

it's just so new that if you keep static it won't get you nowhere

i thought i would die here

nope, i'm very well alive

i bring changes in life of several people not to mention myself

to tell you the most detail parts of stories i wouldn't have enough character to describe it all. but for once and for all i feel what those people feel. self actualization. 2 words, 7 syllables but wide in meaning. you might think, " what the hell is this freak talking about now?" i'm talking about self identity, keeping it real, and standing still with any words they are throwing on your face. it's about showing everyone who you really are and not scared of it. i'm talking the pioneers of women's emancipation those who can rely on themselves.

for one i take a stand for myself, i refuse to listen to my mom. i joined internship of BEM well, for those who are not familiar with the word it is an organization that would give you plenty of opportunity to be well umm, freaking dizzy and busy with their assignments. why i want it? i'm not sure why but it's a matter of dignity and again self-actualization.

i need to take a breath, i need to walk very slow, and really watch the road. i know it might be a little bumpy on the road. but i'm willing to take that chance i need to know what i am capable of, and how hard i can take punches in the face. i refuse to take the safe road and i declare my freedom of thought as a person, a daughter, and a human being. i need support. yes i need every bit of it

reborn

hi!

been long gone from this world...

i miss everything from my world before this

the sarcastic bitter and wild girl lies beneath me now

i'm no longer that girl

i'm no longer 16

I AM 17 YEARS OLD NOW HAHAHA

bittersweet though i am getting older, yes

but you know what i'm savoring the moment

posting a wee bit to show you i still care

sign out see ya!!!

my story

mamaku mungkin skeptis

mamaku mungkin seseorang yang ga menghargai persahabatan sebanyak aku

tapi...

itu ga membuat aku orang yang sama

aku orang yang benar benar berbeda dengannya

aku orang yang mencintai persahabatan dan esensinya

aku orang yang menghargai persahabaatan lewat secarik kertas atau potongan majalah

aku orang yang bersedia tidak tidur untuk seorang teman

aku orang yang menangis karena mendengar satu kalimat

aku orang yang mengabaikan apapun demi apa yang kuinginkan

semua itu sempat terkubur

hidup ini keras, kata seseorang

sempat membentuk aku yang berbeda

tapi hari ini aku rasa aku kembali

ga ada seorang pun yang mengerti tingkahku

cuma aku

aku orang yang menghargai hal hal kecil dalam hidup satu juta kali lebih dari pada orang lain

dan aku bangga

terserah apa kata kalian bahkan keluargaku sendiri

aku itu ya aku

hidup dengan itu atau tidak sama sekali

gift for a friend

the sky changed colour

the rain drops

the world is sad for us

but it's no end

it's a start

i know, you too, we know....

when the door opened i saw you probably not for the last, but probably for a long while

i smile, i couldn't imagine it was gonna be the last time, it's hard

but i still smile knowing about it

when the door slammed i instantly cried...

the moment was clear but it was somehow very difficult to say

i wanna say a lot of things

i should say thank you

no, i can never thank you enough

i should give you a longer hug

no, you worth more than just a hug you worth a thousand hug

we may never had any picture to show our relation

but without anyone's concern we walk and talk and laugh

we think "screw the world"

we live our life

everything that i prepared for you, i made it in a hurry

there are so many things going very wrong

i rush everything that i forget to mention there how i want to picture you as all of those presents

i should give you a thousand gift

i suck

i'm not perfect

i am a chocolate you are my sugar

my life was bitter like pills before i met you

you changed me for a better person

like a sugar changed the taste of bitter chocolate and make it good

3 buttons means " i love you"

but there are only two

i took the "i" :]

everything i made for you was there for a reason

today i should say i will never find any friend like you

today i should cry in front of you to show how miserable i am

today i should say i wouldn't be the same person

but

that would be naive and selfish

you are sad too

but when i saw you today everything that i thought would change in my life without you

i believe will be entirely the same

because you leave the town

but you heart remains

and we will still be the same person we were until the day we meet again

THANK YOU

thank you a lot for staying there through thick and thin

i know when we meet again we will still the same

the very same best friends we were...

PS: i will take you to a trip along the city when you come back

bangun

let's just say teenagers love other teenagers

and it doesn't work

untung untung kalo sempet pacaran terus putus

tau yang lebih buruk

menunggu seorang alien selama 3 tahun berturut turut yang sama sekali ga membuahkan hasil malahan selalu aja bikin sakit hati

dia sih ga tau hal hal kecil yang dia lakuin itu efeknya besar banget ke kita tapi mana dia peduli

dia peduli kalo kita buat dia ngerasa seneng tapi apa ada imbalnya ke kita?

WAKE UP!!!

dia itu ga tertarik sama kita. no matter what we do

ga peduli kita tanya ke dia, dia lagi sakit apa

ga peduli kita selalu ngecek seatnya selama ulangan umum

ga peduli kita selalu ngecek status facebooknya in case dia lagi patah hati

ga peduli seberapa lama dia cuekin kita, dan kita masih gila tentang dia

DIA GA PEDULI SAMA KITA

mana dia tau kita seharian nangis di lab fisika cuman gara-gara dia "jadian" sama cewek lain

mana dia tau kita setengah mati ngebisa-bisain jalan bareng padahal keadaan sangat ga mungkin untuk jalan

mana dia tau kita sampe lari lari ke luar rumah cuman buat beli pulsa supaya bisa bales smsnya yang isinya cuman

"iya.kenapa?"

saya stuck selama tiga tahun kaya got yang ga pernah dibersihin kotorannya selalu numpuk di ujung selokan dan kalo hujan deres banjir meluap luap. TEPAT SEPERTI ITULAH SAYA....

pas semua masalah ngumpul jadi satu dan ga ada yang beres ditambah pikiran ttg di dan gosipnya semua cuman malah jadi luapan emosi yang ngabisin tenaga, pikiran, dan kebebasan saya...

saya ga tau kenapa tepatnya saya nulis tulisan ini

tapi baru aja saya dapet sms temen dekat saya betapa dia patah hati karena mantannya itu jadian sama cewek lain...

dia itu terlalu buta mengabaikan semua fakta di belakang itu, betapa ceweknya pernah ngejer-ngejer berondong tapi dia abaikan semua fakta itu sebelumnya dia cuman jatuh cinta langsung, straight tanpa peduli lampu merah di kanan kiri dia langsung jatuh cinta tanpa alasan

saya juga untuk pertama kalinya seumur hidup jatuh cinta sama cowok yang "jadian" beberapa kali tapi putus dengan "ga sopan" hhh

i guess we make mistakes all the times karena kita masih labil lah karena masih remaja lah tapi daripada kita menghabiskan bertahun tahun pada lelaki yang sama yang bahkan ga tau warna kesukaan kita

DROP OUT OF IT IMMEDIATELY

sebelum kalian menderita berkepanjangan

cari cowok lain

cari hobi lain

cari hal lain

masih ada jutaan ikan di lautan

jodoh kalian ada di luar sana

jangan menghabiskan waktu sama orang yang seuseless mereka

itu lost mereka udah ngelepas kalian

WAKE UP!!!!

see? i'm very labile

stupid teenagers hormone FUCK YOU!

I HATE HORMONE

i should be happy and instead i felt what?

miserable

fuck you adrenaline, estrogen or whatever they call you

sebuah post dan perasaan

sekarang saya lebih tahu apa yang saya rasakan

siapa saya...

i like this other guy from a competition, he blows my mind by the way he talks, thinks and behaves

sekarang saya tahu that feeling is just an awe. i don't fall for him. i love the way god create him. i am his fan. he's the BIG PICTURE. but he's not the one i want...

i fall for someone else

a person that is just too complicated to understand but i do :D

he's whatever he is

and i don't care if he's someone who would not understand what melodramatic means

thank you for the other guy to bring back how i really feel. thank you very much. your post was wonderful :)

FATE

ada yg namanya takdir yang ga bisa diubah hidup, mati, jodoh

lainnya?

fleksibel sekali. Tinggal minta langsung dikasih, ngg ga juga sih ada yang langsng dikasih, ada yang ditunda, anda yang diganti tergantung Tuhan moodnya kasi apa

waktu mau tes itb, saya bertanya-tanya dalam hati.."Tuhan, apa yang harus saya minta? minta masuk itb atau minta yang terbaik?"

sayangnya, Tuhan ga jawab pertanyaan saya dengan frontal.

saya buat keputusan sendiri, okelah saya minta nya gini

"Ya Tuhan jadikanlah itb sebagai Universitas terbaik bagi hidup saya, dan masukkanlah saya ke sana"

berulang-ulang setiap sholat, setiap ada kesempatan untuk doa itu yang saya minta.

terus taunya saya ga masuk ke itb, saya ga nyalahin Tuhan ga nyalahin orang tua, saya sempet salahin diri sendiri. Kenapa waktu itu saya doanya maksa? kenapa waktu itu saya ga minta dikasi yang terbaik aja apapun itu biar ga sekecewa ini? saya nangis tersedu sedan waktu tau ditolak?

saya pikir lagi, ohh saya tau...ketika saya doa pikiran saya selalu ada dua ketika mengucap doa saya selalu minta itb tapi hati saya tau yang saya paling ingin adalah diberi yang terbaik apapun itu

jadi setelah ditolak itb -anyway, ditolak unair juga- saya ganti doa

"Ya Tuhan berikanlah saya terbaik, apapun itu berikanlah saya dan kedua orang serta keluarga yang terbaik"

itu yang saya ulang setiap kali, kali ini lebih khusyuk karena saya tau ini adalah yang saya inginkan

di tengah keputus asaan tiba-tiba terbersit aja pengen ikut tes unmul, out of nowhere sambil nangis aku tiba-tiba tegas banget pengen ikut tes ini

enough story, tanpa ekspetasi apapun saya sama sekali ga menyangka bakal diterima di unmul. saya bener bener ga nunggu pengumuman sama sekali, tiba-tiba aja ada kaya 10 sms saying " CONGRATULATION" and i was like..."WHATT???"

satu detik setelah itu aku ngerasa rasa senang banget. BANGET

and i was like, okay should or should not chase after itb? after considering all options and odds and capability *and of course FATE* i decide to take unmul walaupun jurusannya kedokteran yang mana aku sama sekali ga ada kepikiran

why do i call this FATE? gini ya untuk tes ini aku cuman belajar dari buku soal snmptn, terus aku masih ga bisa ngerjain fisika SAMA SEKALI, hari pertama sih lancar aja soalnya bahasa inggris meen, yang hari kedua itu MIPA. Let me put it this wayaku sampe mau muntah, baru kelar ngerjain 60 soal aku mual dan mau muntah aku sampe ga bisa baca soal, pas ngerjain mipa terpadu aku udah ga inget apa-apa, ga ada satupun soal yang nyantol karena aku udah ga mampu sama sekali baca soal...kepalaku pusing abisss aku sempet pesimis

terus ya, ga berhenti disitu waktu aku mikir mau ikut SNMPTN nah terus aku kan liat tanggal pengumumannya 17 juli, nah waktu aku liat di kertas pengumumannya unmul terakhir bayar tanggal 16 juli jadi aku ga jadi ikut daripada riskan mengecewakan diri sendiri. 3 hari setelah pendaftaran SNMPTN selesai, aku liat algi kertas pengumuman unmul DAANNNNN..........ternyata batas akhir bayar adalah 16 AGUSTUS saudara saudara...

saya salah liat kertas pengumuman and it happens like 3 times

kata papaku " kalo emang udah jodoh ga bakal kemana"

so i take his advice, and i accept the offer

i take this as the offer from god :)

FATES ARE JUST SOOO FUNNY, ARENT THEY?

HUMANITY

this is not my kind of quirk to care more to political advances, but this time i have to. My heart is ripped off by this video footage of a palestinian children who is complaining and getting angry about how her clothes smell like gas, and how it suffocates her and her family, how she had to beg for clothes from her neighbor.

i'm pointing this issue from where i'm standing. As a human. My judgement has no correlation with my religion affiliation. As a human being, would you like your house to be bombed by millions of missiles? how would you feel if you lost your innocent kids for no wrong doing? how do you feel if everything you struggled of having in years are destroyed in no seconds? how do you see a 10 years old prepare themselves with guns, in case their sisters attacked which is pretty ensured by Israel?

from where i'm standing it's horrible, from Palestinian point of view this is pretty much commonly their daily bases of lives.

okay now i'm going to try to be a reply speaker for let's say neutral team, i would say

Israel is only doing what they do because they want to protect their armed-with-modern-handguns-with helmet-bulletproof coat guys from people who are throwing rocks, fire, small cheap home made alcohol bomb with no safety protection whatsoever.

and let's see what happened just a couple of days ago. Israel is attacking an activists boat that transport 11 tons of help for Palestinian who are trapped in Gaza and having a hard time finding foods,water, aids, and medical supplies. What happened? Israel troops are attacking the boat and exactly 9 activists are confirmed murdered in that incident

whoow whoow...did i just say incident? as long as i remembered incident happened if it is not planned. How about this one? was these 19 people are PLANNING to bomb Israel? or probably these actvist are PLANNING on sneaking in to Israel territory? but why are these people are not attacking the troops with guns if they are really really endangering Israel troops? why are they fight against the troops with bare hands instead pulling out guns if they are really concerned as danger? why are they so incapable of fighting back if they are dangerous? isn't it weird?

check this out, it's a statement provided by the minister of foreign affairs in Israel

"During the interception of the ships, the demonstrators onboard attacked the IDF naval personnel with live fire and light weaponry including knives and clubs. Additionally one of the weapons used was grabbed from an IDF soldier. The demonstrators had clearly prepared their weapons in advance for this specific purpose."

knives?

clubs?

compared to handguns that can ripped your ribs?

ooohh those activists must be really good with knives to scare the hell out of the troops

why does it have to cause innocent victims?

why attacking by lethal moves to kill more people instead of disabling the attacker if that's even really really necessary?

why putting hundreds of people in cuff with less food and water while their intention is pure to help other people from suffer?

what else is interesting?

in a video footage it was shown that the troops are asking the region of those activists, some from Malaysia, Indonesia, England, and etcetera

troops : where do you come from?

A : England *troops letting go cuff and suddenly treating the person nice"

troops : where do you come from?

B : Indonesia *troops laughing, and the spitting on his face"

good nice example troops

if my parent see me spitting on people's face they would give me REAL pain in my ass

but apparently killing people too often ruining their morality. As an Indonesian i'm not offended by what those troops did but i feel pity for that country to allow such morality disorder being done by their saint heroic troops.

oops, i forget at this moment i have to put my point of view on Israel. this is really hard to understand what they do but it easier to find thousands of point of view to be against Israel.

right now people all over the world are protesting what Israel do, and what Israel are stating is that they are just trying to PROTECT THEMSELVES and by that it allows them to attack the civilians ; including activists

now i'm gonna see this from Palestine point of view

shit, those activists will not make it. My babies and I are going to be starved for another day. Whatever we or other people try to do for Palestine are always wrong in the eyes of Israel. It will always end up with war for them. As long as we die not in the mist of smoke from nuclear and missiles, we are fine. As long as I can still pray to God i'm fine.

that's the only point of view that i can find for Palestine.

yet, i keep typing this but the war is not stopping

what i would like to do by this post is to state what side i am in

I just hope that this war is not going to make the start of another war. we should not address this war to Moslem's, Jewish, or Christian but this is a war of HUMANITY.

that's the point of view i would like to believe

I AM IN THE SIDE OF JUSTICE AND HUMANITY

who you impress? or not....

10.000 people walk on the street

the other 10.000 sit on chairs

10.000 people are in hospital wondering are they gonna be okay

and probably 10.000 others are at a club night enjoying the rest of the night in booze dreamy land

and the other 6 billion minus 40.000 people are doing whatever they are doing

my question is...

is there any possibility that just one of them thinking of me at this second?

for those of you who possibly reading this may think of me as a weird person

why would i bother to be concern with the fact that is there someone thinking of me?

but it is important

yes it is

why?

we were born, we breath, we live, we die and in between we did things many things, bad, good, evil, naive, dignify and else

the thing is, did what we do mater to people around us? did we make an impression ? or we're easily forgotten?

that's why when people are in love they are thinking of each other, that what makes love worthy.

to be concerned by other people, so lucky............

but what about the rest of us who got no love? well we got family...

how did it go with our family? good or bad?

soon you'll move out and leave them, good family meet again every Saturday

bad family, see you somewhere if we're getting very fortunate

i've seen hundreds, thousands probably of broken family

is that also an impression?

yes

but it's a bad one. the kind that people will try to forget

so in the end more of us are being forgotten

is it so hard to find a little tiny room in billions of cells in a single human's brain just to put ourselves?

just to belong somewhere?

not yet!

we got friends

in 10 years their faces starts to blur

in 30 years you'll forget your friends surname

an 50 years you will not recognize them even if they hit you in your face

so who will remember me? or you? and you?

who?

am i important?

if yes then, do you think of me? is it just once in a while?or just now cause you read my post?

if no, do you think i'm not making impression to the world?

then where do i belong in the world?

what can i do to impress?

to be present, speak, and being heard

how is that?

to live your life just the way you dreamed it

well then i'm gonna try

I THINK I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE ANGRY BECAUSE YOU'RE MY FRIENDS AND FRIENDS SUPPOSE TO TELL STORIES

BUT, WHEN THAT DAY COMES I'LL SMILE AND GIVE YOU A BIG HUG AND ALSO PRETEND THAT I'M OKAY AND I'M NOT DISAPPOINTED IN YOU

BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO HAVE YOUR PERFECT DAY

MY FEELINGS ARE INFERIOR

I JUST THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT FROM ALL THOSE FAKERS THAT HAS BEEN BACKSTABBING ME

BUT IT IS EVEN MORE SAD

I DON'T NEED COMPASSION, I EXPERIENCED BEING LET DOWN BY FRIEND MORE THAN ENOUGH

I JUST NEED YOU TO KNOW HOW I FEEL

THANK YOU

judgement

orang ga tau posisi kamu, ga tau keadaan keluarga kamu, ga tau apa yang harus kamu hadapin

jadi ketika mereka menjudge bilang kamu ga asik, kamu sensitif, kamu bermasalah, kamu itu menakutkan...

mereka cuma belum pernah ada di posisi mu...

jadi when shit happens and people start to judge again, just smile and wave

life is unfair many times, but sure is...

life is also a wheel that rotate

you position can be his/hers, and when it is, just smile again and wave

SAHABAT GUE MENIKAH!!!

FYI gue udah potong rambut, rambut gue hilang sekitar 30 centimeter, sedih awalnya tapi gue tau this is what it takes to transform , first step actually

oke, i'm not going to spend probably half of the page talking about my hair cut

something else is happening

MY BEST FRIEND SUKMA IS GETTING MARRIED

all right...wols wols

darn! this is shocking...she's been talking about how much she wants to get marry but i never expect to be this fast. she's 18 anyway and we just graduate from senior high a month ago

i'm happy of course, but stunned, shocked, and confused

i don't know how to react at first, but then i thought "come on it's her choice, god let her that way because knowing that it would be best for her"

so

CONGRATULATIONS!!! MAY YOU BE BLESSED AND LIVE THE PERFECT ENDING OF A FAIRYTALE, HAPPILY EVER EVER AFTER!!!MAY YOU HAVE KIDS THAT YOU ADORE, AND ADORE YOU!!!MAY YOUR LIFE BE FULL OF HAPPINESS AND A LOVING FAMILY...MAY YOU TWO BE A GOOD COUPLE AND GOOD PARENTS... MAY YOU LIVE THE WONDERFUL LIFE!!!!semoga punya hidup yang sakinah mawaddah warohmah.semoga semua hal yang kamu impikan bisa terwujud...semoga hidupmu dipenuhi dengan mimpi yang jadi kenyataan...and I AM HAPPY FOR YOU...

dan saat seseorang akan punya hidup barunya bersama orang lain, saya akan memulai perjalanan baru ditemani diri saya sendiri

banyak orang bilang saya keliatannya benci pernikahan

tapi

walaupun saya sering terlihat sangat cynical dalam memandang penikahan, tetapi suatu hari saya pun mau menikah, tapi ketika saya sudah siap, sangat siap, karena buat saya pernikahan adalah sesuatu yang sangat sangat besar dan perlu komitmen yang tangguh

walaupun saya bilang pernikahan itu ujung-ujungnya mengakibatkan kedua pihak sering terluka, tapi banyak hal yang menakjubkan dari penikahan, menjadi ibu, punya anak, mengurus anak, mengurus keluarga dan banyak lagi hal hebat lainnya

walaupun saya bilang kalo pernikahan itu mengakhiri masa senang- senang tapi pernikahan itu menawarkan jauh lebih baik which is hidup yang penuh dengan usaha untuk membuat senang satu sama lain

saya akan menikah entah ketika umur berapa saya...26, 27, or 30 they are just numbers...tapi suatu hari pasti

*mau tau seberapa cynicalnya saya ttg pernikahan? sepanjang saya menulis post ini saya merinding sendiri :)*

elza samantha elmira

HAIR CUT!!!!!!!

let's get to the point immediately

I WILL CUT MY HAIR!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i'm panic!!!!

okay so the decision is all mine, but the execution???

what if she cut the wrong hair, what if she forget how to cut it in the middle of the way??what if she cut in the wrong line????what if, what if, and a lot of what ifs

it's not my first time, i cut my hair though 2 months ago, and as my model FARA FAWCETT, it was freaking hot, but it grows and on and on, it's very long now. my hair almost touch my butt, damn it's too long

it's just i don't feel healthy living with them, something is really really wrong with this hair...

i'm gonna cut it short, not so short probably in line with shoulder or even lower...

god!!!this is very hard....

hmmm, but

posting this post makes me even want to cut this hair now

so bye, imma off to...i don't know, hair stylist? who am i kidding? some place which has some women to be asked to cut my hair nicely, hhh this better be a god hair cut, or i'll kill her

*none of those matter cause none of you will ever see my hair anyway ahahaha

SELAMAT BERJUANG SEMOGA DITERIMA DI ITB YAA...GOOD LUCK :)